REVIEW: Short Attention: Clever, Maddening, & Annoying

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shortattYou want a pop punk super group? You’ve got it. Attention span too short for those long two minute songs? We’ve got the cure for that too. The answer? Short Attention. A group including members of The Ergs!, Unlovables, Dirt Bike Annie, Steinways, and Slaughterhouse Four. They put out their first ‘album’ on Cold Feet Records in 2007, “Clever, Maddening, & Annoying”. It includes twenty nine songs and clocks in way under twenty nine minutes, every song is under a minute. Some having the title of the sing be longer than the actual song. Speaking of the sing titles, a lot of them are quite great, personal favorites include “I Have An Unhealthy Thing With Asian Girls” and “Dislikes: Anyone Who Drinks Pepsi” – both very true. This come out as a 7″, with a CD included so you get your bang for your buck and everything is catchy as fuck. If you like pop punk and short songs you should already own this.

1. Quit Your Job
2. On The List
3. John Locke
4. Pointless Breakup Song
5. Double Deuce
6. Tortoise And Hare
7. Co-ed Kelly #12
8. Lunch Break
9. Cell Phone
10. Toilet Paper
11. Numbers
12. Detonator
13. You Suck
14. Revolving Door Romance
15. We Just Go On
16. Cabbage
17. Quiz
18. Cabin Fever
19. The Moon
20. Sister Ray
21. Flavor Of Pop Ice
22. Friday Night
23. I Have An Unhealthy Thing With Asian Girls
24. Freakshow
25. Kill The Dj
26. Another Girl
27. Going To The Store
28. Dislikes: Anyone Who Drinks Pepsi
29. Don’t Start A Band

Get Clever, Maddening & Annoying from Amazon HERE

REVIEW: SPAZZ / Lack of Interest – Double Whammy

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spazzlackIf you know either one of these bands you know what to expect and shouldn’t need any talking into to have this record. For those of you that don’t we’ve got one of the best hardcore/power violence bands around Spazz doing a split with my favorite hardcore band Lack of Interest. Plus to sweeten the pot it’s got Bruce Lee vs Kareem Abdul-Jabbar on the cover! This is one of my favorite records in my collection. The Spazz side has six tracks by the brutal vocal, fast playing power violence machine. This includes “Hey Bob, What’s Up?” to close out the side, great closer. The Lack Of Interest Side is the cream of the crop here. I know this may be hard to believe with Spazz on the other side, but Lack of Interest steals the show here. This side of this record is my favorite thing the band has ever done. Also includes my favorite song my this bunch “Family Massacre”. Dude’s vocals in this band are out of this world, makes me so jealous I don’t sound like him. Now a days this record is kind of hard to find and it might cost you a penny or two but it’s well well worth it. This split embodies exactly what the Deep Six Records sound is.

Spazz Side:
1.  Satan’s Scrilla
2.  SoCal Battle Royale
3.  Gilman 90210
4.  Short Songs
5.  Doomriden
6.  Hey Bob, What’s Up?

Lack Of Interest Side:
1.  Mislead And Deranged
2.  Rotgut
3.  Family Massacre
4.  Plastic Armor
5.  Writing On The Wall
6.  No More/Don’t Tell Me

Get it from Deep Six Records HERE

REVIEW: The Ergs!: Books About Miles Davis

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ergsbooksOne of The Ergs! many 7″s, one of The Ergs! many GREAT 7″s. When this came out, I rolled down to my local record shop, scooped it up and hurried home to listen. Put the record on, give my first listen to one of my now favorite ergs songs “Books About Miles Davis” after it ended I anxiously flipped over the record to hear the catchy tune “Only Babies Cry”. After this song ended the record was over, so what else could I do besides flip it over once again and give it a second listen. I listened to this record three times before giving it a break from the turntable’s needle. Both songs were quickly learned so I could sing along every time they hit my ears. “Books About Miles Davis” has become a staple of their live set, or rather had become until they broke up. Most of the song being sang by Mikey Erg whilst on the shoulders of someone because there’s no drums till much later where it breaks down into its total awesomeness. On this single I later realized why this was labeled as the “single version” of the song. On the album, there’s an absents of the egg shaker that you hear in here. A minor difference but I actually prefer the “single version”, apparently this was done because the band couldn’t decided if the song was better with or without the egg shaker, but I dig it. The B side, “Only Babies Cry” is a cover song by Paul Baribeau, who’s a great performer in his own right. I was unaware for a long time that this song was a cover because it seemed to fit in so well with the band. I could totally believe this was an Ergs song, they just knock it out of the park when covering it. This unfortunately I only saw preformed once by them, it wasn’t done very often for some reason. This two single was brought to us by the great people over at Whoa Oh Records. While both of these songs are now available on The Ergs! complication record “Hindsight is 20/20, My Friend” however if your an Ergs! nerd you can most likely still find this floating around in its original form if you look hard enough.

a. “Books About Miles Davis”
b. “Only Babies Cry”

 

<a href=”http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000QR23DO/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B000QR23DO&linkCode=as2&tag=unclcrit-20″>Get Books About Miles Davis from Amazon HERE</a><img src=”http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=unclcrit-20&l=as2&o=1&a=B000QR23DO&#8221; width=”1″ height=”1″ border=”0″ alt=”” style=”border:none !important; margin:0px !important;” />

REVIEW: Beatnik Termites: Lineage

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lineageI’m not totally sure why I’m putting this up here because this is a 7″ with two cover songs on it but it’s here and you shall read. As I said this is a cover 7″. Pop punkers the Beatnik Termites are covering a song by two pop punk pioneers. First we’ve got “Suburban Home” which is a Descendents song as you should know. And on the B side, we’ve got “Minute” a cover of the great ALL. Both covers are really good versions and go greatly with the Termites styles and vocals. I really like “Suburban Home” better than “Minute” as far as the originals go, but for this slab of vinyl I enjoy the ALL cover a bit more, though both are great. It was put out on Coolidge Records and I don’t believe there were any different colors, sorry record nerds, but even still, given the chance you should pick this up if you see it.

A:  Suburban Home (Descendents cover)
B:  Minute (All cover)

REVIEW: The Unlovables: Crush Boyfriend Heartbreak

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crushboyfriendThis is the album you can’t help but sing along to, only thing is if your a dude be prepared to get some strange looks, good news is for you ladies you can stop getting those strange looks. This is more or less your standard catchy pop punk album, so sweet it’ll give you cavities, the catch? It’s a female fronted group, which I totally dig. But being of the opposite gender Hailey, as you may guess doesn’t sing songs about girls but rather songs about boys. It’s a nice change to hear the girls missing the boys here but as I said before, it’ll get you some odd looks when your singing along in your car. Out on Whoa Oh Records (a quality pop punk label) the Unlovables are part of this new wave of pop punk that seems to be coming from the NY/NJ area. Them being from New York is about the only thing I hold against this band. The really good news here is unlike other pop punk powerhouses The Ergs! and the Steinways, the Unlovables are still together. Granted they don’t tour a whole lot, that could be because Mikey Erg is in this band, and as you may or may not know, hes in about 10 other bands so I guess things like touring can get complicated. Crush Boyfriend Heartbreak is the Unlovables first album, but second release, they put out an EP earlier. In my option this is also their best release. Their second album was great as well but this one just inches in at the top spot. If you enjoy some pop punk then you should really dig this album. Catchy, poppy, and great girl vocals, I think I’m in love with this woman.

1. I’ve Cried 4 U
2. If You Were Here
3. I Want A Boy
4. Today’s The Day (I Finally Kissed You)
5. Doot Da Doot
6. Vacation
7. I Already Know
8. Bein’ In Love
9. Counting Sheep
10. It Sucks
11. Feelin’ All Emo (Since I Broke Up With You)
12. Non Stop Thinking of You
13. Inconsolable

Get Crush Boyfriend Heartbreak from Amazon HERE

REVIEW: JCVD

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jcvdNow I like Jean-Claude Van Damme as much as the next action junkie, but lets be honest here he hasn’t made a decent movie sense Double Team. And was that not only really not that good but it was also twelve years and and sixteen movies ago. Wake of Death a few years back was his supposed comeback to greatness, and it sucked. So now we’re presented with JCVD. In this film our side kicking friend isn’t playing an underground fighter, or some cyborg solider, he simply plays Jean-Claude Van Damme. It’s a role that even he should be able to handle. Van Damme is, as it were, an actor. He’s in the middle of making movies and being in and out of court for a child custody battle, balancing this out with the every day problem of just trying to find the money to pay his bills. In the middle of all of this the man needs to hit the bank to get some money to cover a check he wrote, seems normal enough. However this is JCVD and Van Damme walks right into a bank robbery. However he does not, as you would expect, spin kick the criminals and save the day, no instead he is taken hostage and inadvertently framed for the robbery. The cops go to the bank when they hear gun shots, see Van Damme moving a cabinet and jump to conclusions. Not only is this possibly the first Van Damme with a solid, non-80’s action, story line. If you pay attention there’s also a little bit of acting throw in here. Your waiting for that hero moment the whole movie, but it never comes, well it does but its fake. And that’s one of the best things I like about this, that and the ending which is pretty stellar. Yes you can proudly display this on your shelf next to Kickboxer and Bloodsport to make your Van Damme essential collection complete.

Get JCVD from Amazon HERE

REVIEW: The Ergs!: That’s It… Bye

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thatsitbyeSo this past year the best pop punk band sense MTX broke up. The Ergs! But before they left us they dropped one more release, the EP that was going to be a full length, appropriately titled “That’s It… Bye”. Granted The Ergs! have, and apparently are continuing to release postmortem material like the pop punk 2pac, but this was the last new material out before they officially called it a day. Released on Don Giovanni Records who put a large chunk of Ergs! material and hastily done as a ‘tour edition’ 12″ single in order to be out in time for their last show, it was later released with a proper edition with a real sleeve. Mitch Clem is responsible for the cover art for this release, I highly commend Mitch, I’ve been a big fan of his work for some time and this is some of the best cover art I’ve seen a while. Here we get what are seemingly the last three songs written and recorded by The Ergs!. ‘Anthem For A New Amanda’ is the traditional Ergs song, catchy cords, memorable lyrics, girls, I can’t get enough of this song. ‘…And The True Believers’ another classic Ergs jam, these two songs alone just thinking about how good they are pisses me off all over again that The Ergs! broke up. We could have had an entire album of this gold, more great sing along shows and fun for all. But on to the third of the three tunes on this slab of vinyl, ‘Piltdown Man’ While Mikey sings most of The Ergs! songs, Jeff steps in to lend a different take on the vocal stylings of the band, and does quite a good job at it. ‘Piltdown Man’ has Jeff vocals, which really fits the song really well. Somewhat of a different tempo song than the other two, also very enjoyable. If you don’t own this record, you should. I don’t care if you don’t have a turntable to play it on, that’s not an excuse for not hearing these tunes. Go pick this up and mourn the loss of The Ergs! with the rest of us.

1. Anthem For A New Amanda
2. …And The True Believers
3. Piltdown Man

Get it from Don Giovanni Records HERE

Get That’s It… Bye from Amazon HERE

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