REVIEW: Haywire

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In case you don’t know who Gina Carano is she’s an MMA fighter. She’s pretty badass in the ring, with only one loss, it’s clear she’s good at what she does. But now she’s trying her hand at movies it seems. This is her first real role, a Steven Soderbergh film, the guy that directed Ocean’s Twelve and Traffic. Besides having the lovely Gina in it the movie tries to bring some class with Michael Douglas and some action movie street cred with Antonio Banderas (looking like Saddam Hussein’s twin for most of the movie). This movie was a lot of fun; it reminds me a lot of the cheesy action movies of the 90’s. I’m not talking the big budget monsters like Terminator and Rambo I mean the almost B movie type. Where you’ve just got people beating the crap out of each other for an hour and a half and saying some good one liner’s sometimes. That’s pretty much what this is, Gina kicking lots of ass for an hour and a half. The movie doesn’t look like a million bucks, (though with a twenty three million dollar budget you might wonder why not), it is amazing fun. Anyone who enjoyed the fist to face action movies of years ago, I’m talking the Chuck Norris, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Steven Segal, Don ‘The Dragon’ Wilson movies will love this movie for exactly what it is. I for one hope Gina Carano keeps making lots of action movies; I will go see every one of them.

Get Haywire from Amazon HERE

REVIEW: Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

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It’s been a while since I’ve seen a good spy flick so I was pretty happy when I saw the trailer for Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. And when I saw it had Gary Oldman I was totally sold. What I didn’t know is it had a strong cast through the whole movie, during the opening credits I was just getting even more excited for what was ahead. Based on a novel by John le Carré it’s the story of a retired intelgance man trying to find a mole within British Intelengence. There’s plenty of flashbacks as a good part of this takes place in the 70’s, that part of the movie looks espically remarkable but it also ties together real well with the present day stuff. You really don’t realize how much this movie is sucking you in as your watching it, at one point I realised I was hunched over in the theater with my elbows on my knees totally enthrawed with what was going on. It’s a solid spy movie, but it’s not one of the elete great ones, I can’t really place it but it’s missing something. But reguardless it’s a really good movie, anyone that’s into mysteries and spy stories will be totally into this movie.

Get Tinker, Tailor Soldier, Spy from Amazon HERE

REVIEW: Young Adult

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Young Adult, the new movie Written by Diablo Cody (writer of Juno) and directed by Jason Reitman (Director of Juno and Thank You For Smoking). With these credentials, and the fact that it has Patton Oswalt it was a sure thing that I was going to see this movie. Little did I know that would not be the best use of my time. The movie centers around Mavis Gary (played by Charlize Theron), a woman that writes Young Adult books. Her life is pretty much a wreck; her career isn’t going much better than that. She’s a mess of a person that’s pretty much still acting like a dumb teenager. Her old boyfriend has a baby so of course she decides to go back to her home state to try and break up his marriage and get with him. Ninety percent of this movie is pretty painful to watch, it’s filled with such awkward scenes you want to turn away from the screen. And not like in that uncomfortable funny awkward, just that ‘ugh why am I watching this’ awkward. Basically the only people in the movie I didn’t hate were Matt (Patton Oswalt) and his sister Sandra (Collette Wolfe), the rest of them, ugh they could fall into the ocean and the world would be better off. Sandra doesn’t have much screen time in the movie, in fact I think she’s only seen four times, and three of them being for less than a minute. Matt however has a decent amount of screen time, which is good because he’s really the only semi-saving grace of the film. Almost every scene with Matt is a great one, Patton Oswalt really is not only a great comedian but a great actor and it shows here. Plus on a nerd side of things every scene he’s in is like a nerdgasum of ‘spot the cool things in the background’. From the punk band shirts and stickers to the comic posters and figures I kind of feel like they told Patton to just show up in whatever he was wearing and they went and filmed in his real house. I know I felt a connection with this sad bitter nerdy drunken person. Let’s get a spinoff show of him and forget the rest of the movie.

Get Young Adult from Amazon HERE

Top Movies and Music of the first half of 2011

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Well June is here, and you know what that means? It’s time for the first half of the year lists. It’s been a fucking great year for music so far in 2011. The top music list I already hate myself for having to knock so many great releases so far down the list but it’s just been stellar release after stellar release. On the movie side of things though it’s been a pretty slow year, so instead of the standard top five for the half I’m only going to do a top three. So let’s go ahead and get this underway!

Top 3 movies – First half of 2011

1. Green Hornet
2. Hangover 2
3. Thor

And the worst movie of the year so far is…

No Strings Attached

Now on to the music, normally I split these into a few posts but because it was a short movie list I’m just cramming everything here. If you didn’t make the list, fear not, there’s still half a year for things to get moved and you’re probably on the list somewhere anyway (if it’s good). I’m also splitting things up a little different this year so there’s actually more lists, you’ll see.

Top 10 albums – First half of 2011

1. Motorhead: The World Is Yours
2. Deep Sleep: Turn Me Off
3. Sundials: Never Settle
4. Raphael Saadiq: Stone Rollin’
5. Rendondo Beat: Meet Rendondo Beat
6. Power Quest: Blood Alliance
7. Mind Spiders: Mind Spiders
8. The Underground Railroad to Candyland: Knows Your Sins
9. The Dwarves: Are Born Again
10. Spraynard: Funtitled

Top 10 EP’s – First half of 2011

1. Rational Anthem: Bread Line
2. Night Birds: Midnight Movies
3. The Fucking Cops: Fuck You Up With Some Truth
4. Cell Mates: Shoulda Kept That Quarter!
5. The Slow Death: Turnstile Comix #1
6. Chixdiggit!: Safeways Here We Come
7. Teenage Bottlerocket: Mutilate Me
8. The Typos: The Typos
9. The Zits: Summer Pop Dreams EP
10. Clint Maul: Great Dividing EP

Top 5 splits – First half of 2011

1. Direct Hit/Tit Patrol
2. Dopamines/Dear Landlord
3. The Queers & Killtime
4. Wax Phantom/Criminal Culture
5. Unwelcome Guests/255’s

Top 3 Singles – First half of 2011

1. Mikey Erg: Heart Shaped 12″
2. Brain F: So Dim
3. Big Eyes: Why Can’t I

And I’ll just throw this in for now since there hasn’t been too many demo’s I’ve come across this year (less than 5!!), I hope the second half picks up on this front.

The best Demo of the year so far:

The Masked Intruder: Demo

REVIEW: Foxy Brown

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Coffy was a pretty good success in 1973; the following year came a sequel, Foxy Brown. We’ve got Jack Hill as the returning writer and director and in our star role it is once again Pam Grier. Because the studio was afraid of being in the sequel business in the time it was made this isn’t ‘Coffy 2′, the names and title are different. But we’ve got the same dope pusher killing woman we all love back for some more revenge. This time around her own brother has her boyfriend killed for ratting out some bad dudes. So Foxy goes on her focused frenzy of revenge out to take down as many dealers as possible. While I do like Coffy more, Foxy Brown is not a movie to be missed. It’s got that same down and dirty mean streak that you’d associate with these movies and rates as ones of the best in the genre.

Get Foxy Brown from Amazon HERE

REVIEW: Knucklehead

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When, WHEN will I learn to stop watching WWE movies? Over and over I fall for the same tricks, most of the time I figure the stupid action movies or awful looking horror movies will just be bad fun, but they always turn out to be bad. This time around I actually had faith for a good movie. It was a comedy movie, which I’ve always thought they should go with and in the main role this time was the Big Show (Paul Wight), whom I thought was perfect because he’s a pretty entertaining and funny guy. I’m not sure where this movie fell short but it was pretty hard to watch. I guess you have to blame it on the script or the directing but I couldn’t say for sure. The one thing I was really impressed with was the cast here. You didn’t have billion dollar Hollywood super stars but you did have a lot of pretty good names in the credits. Besides your giant star you also had Melora Hardin, Will Patton, and Dennis Farina. But even with a quality cast like this it couldn’t save the movie. The most important thing about a comedy is that you laugh; unfortunately I don’t think I did that even once in this movie. From bland jokes that fall on their face to just really lame toilet humor there’s not much that’s redeemable about the film. The previews for this movie didn’t look too good but I still had to give it a chance. I know when the next one comes out I’ll fall for it again too. At least I can say I think this may have been the best of the WWE movies, but really that’s not saying a lot. This movie is about an orphanage that runs into money trouble (as you can tell already this is the most original story ever); the Big Show is working at the place, and is an orphan himself. Coming through town is a down on his luck gambler who’s looking for a fighter that might help him get out of debt, enter the big man. The two of them with the addition of a fine lady from the orphanage go cross country picking up fights and experience to get to the big tournament where they will inevitably win the money and save everyone making things a super sweet over happy ending. I was really hoping this would be a little more ‘Tommy Boy’ and a lot less, whatever the fuck that was. I assume because they WWE is going for its whole PG thing right now there were a lot of restrictions put on the jokes to make them more family friendly, and as we know, that’s never a good mix for comedy. At least I hope that was the reason this is more like a Full House episode than a comedy movie.

Get Knucklehead from Amazon HERE

REVIEW: The Social Network

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Facebook, everybody uses fucking Facebook now, you might be able to argue that at its peak that MySpace was more popular but then again MySpace never had a movie; Facebook does. Here is the story of how Facebook was born, or the movie version. All of these events may or may not have happened but it makes for some pretty good entertainment. Fitting the role for boy genius and creator of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg is the always awkward, but always great Jesse Eisengerg. Most people will compare him to Michael Cera, which I think is pretty on point. Both have similar acting styles, or just personalities depending on how you look at it. But this is a slight change of gears, Jesse Eisenberg takes the awkwardness that people seem to love and twists is from comedy into being more of an asshole. I’m not sure how much of an anti-social self absorbed jerk Mark Zuckerberg really is but this makes him out to be a pretty big one for most of the movie. He does have his flashes of normal friendly human being in here but it’s not too often. The movie is pretty great but I do think it was massively overhyped. I think it is one of the best movies of the year, but not fucking amazingly best thing ever like some people will tell you.

Get The Social Network from Amazon HERE

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